A little over a year ago I was brought to Psalm 40:1-3 from a devotion that I read. When I first read it, it made me think to send it to a loved one who was battling addiction. And what I told them along with the picture of this scripture was that I was proud of them and that God was using this in their life to further His kingdom, for His good, for their story to help others through their own struggles with addiction. And while I am still confident that God put that scripture in my life to send to them, man, did He know all too well that I needed it for myself.
Two pictures, the first is the one I sent to that person a little over a year ago, shortly after I began reading it almost daily, to the second, months after it started changing my life. I felt led to send it to them. I then continued to read it almost daily and wish that I would have put dates beside the notes that I took, just to see when it all started. This scripture opened my eyes to my own struggles, to my own addictions, to my own story of His redemption.
Maybe you have read this scripture a thousand times and it has spoken to your heart like mine, or maybe you are me a little over a year ago and reading it for the first time.
IT.WILL.CHANGE.YOUR.HEART.
It will open your eyes to your struggles in life, to His goodness again and again. It will remind you of that last time you said “thank you God” for that answered prayer, even if it wasn’t the answer you were praying for. You will begin to remember all of the times that He saved you out of that pit of despair and how He will save you from the one you may be in now. And He will remind YOU of how He is using your story, your “this” that is making you uncomfortable, making you grow in ways that you never knew before you truly knew Him and sought Him, how what seems like impossible right now can be possible with Him, how whatever “it” is in your life, he CAN and WILL use it for His good, He will use your story to help others in theirs.
Something I struggle with DAILY is anxiety and fear, you could say it’s my addiction. I have allowed it to overtake my mind at times. And although I know it’s not good for me, I keep going back to it, OVER AND OVER AGAIN. And as I’ve started opening up about this over the last year, to myself, as well as others, the response I get is, “What? I would never think that about you.” Well I promise it’s real life. And although I try to spend my mornings with God, exercise regularly and try to eat pretty healthy, that does not exempt me from the devil trying his best to get in my head, and I have let him succeed way too much.
And I don’t know why I’m sharing this with everyone, except that I feel like God has been leading me to for a little while now(TRUTH: I actually wrote this almost two months ago, typed it in my phone one morning, but let the devil stop me that day), and hopefully this scripture can help someone else too. And maybe, just knowing that even though people may look put together on the outside, it doesn’t mean that they aren’t struggling on the inside. And although, if you know me, I can tend to be a little OCD, expecting “perfection” from myself most of the time, it’s something that I am learning to lay down at His feet. Things like:
-Being vulnerable(like right now😉)
-Pride(bringing me to my knees, to His feet)
-Realizing perfect doesn’t exist this side of heaven, but finding strength in Him and growing in my walk with Him, allowing those same fears to be crushed by showing how an imperfect me can be loved and cherished and found by the almighty Him. And how this isn’t the end, how I know that the devil will continue to fight to get into my head, and how some days he may win that fight, but he won’t win the victory!
I hope you all have a great day.
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